Why is Harry Potter fake Because its a movie

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Knock Knock Who’s there? Boo Boo who? Ah don’t be sad, Boo’s here to cheer you up!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What is a black man's favorite food? It differs from person to person.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do watermelons taste like? Sand.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Japanese study of the stereotypical American man: Murica: Come on come on! Japanese: Uh yes? *walks toward American* Murica: Are you okay?! Japanese: Well yes I am doi.. Murica: BUSTER WOLF *Punches Japanese which smacks into the ground critically wounded. Murican: OKAAAAAAAAAAAY! *throws dirty trucker cap at Japanese man and leaves.* BEWARE OF THE TYPICAL AMERICAN! Study 2 American man, taught Japanese Discipline: Japanese: Herrow Mr.Educated American *bows* "Japanesed Murican": *Fighting Pose* " I SHALL STAIN MY HANDS, WITH YOUR BLOOD!" *Japanese people run away* Experiment fail. BEWARE EXTREMELY OF AMERICAN MAN! Nero: Nuking Japan probably created a few controversies and wrong stereotypes... After visiting the US several times, I find these manners to be of the Texan stereotype though... Educated Murican: PREDICTABO!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

If Michelle rides her bike at 15 mph for 20 minutes and Erik rides his bike at 20 mph for 12 minutes, why is Michelle not in the kitchen?

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do Whitney Houston and MTV have in common? They both REALLY died in the 90's.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

If god gives you lemons keep the lemon go to the store and buy oranges to make orange juice.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for the winter and now I am dead." Ha! It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What is the quickest way to speed up your 70 year old husband’s heart rate? Extract of foxglove is a very effective blocker of the parasympathetic nervous system, and since the parasympathetic nervous system is responsible for slowing the heart, this would lead to an increase in heart rate. However, it is very dangerous to use such chemicals without advice, and therefore it is better to seek an examination and, if necessary, a prescription from a qualified GP.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Alright so an elite group of Navy Seals walk into a mansion. They open fire on Osama Bin Laden and kill him.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Knock Knock Whos there? Your mom My mom died three years ago, please go away while i cry.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I have a toaster. I have two subway coupons and a handful of pubic hair equal trade baby

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Whats the difference between a black guy and a bench? Ones a person and the others a bench.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

So Nero, what the fuck are you doing? XD

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did Hitler say to the black jew? Get to the back of the oven

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what do you call a door made of steel? a steel door

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Man: Hey honey! you look mighty fine today! Want to go play some lax? Woman: I'd love to! Thanks babe! Man: Just kidding you are a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How did john walk on the sun? We don't know, he probably burned to death before getting close.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

dyslexics of the world untie!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

so a black guy, an asian, and a scott are sitting at a bar, they drink responsibly, pay their tab, and leave. The evening couldn't have been more pleasant.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

There was a chicken. It squarked.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What is terrible and doesn't exist? This joke's punchline,

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops