What did the cat say to the towel? Meow.

What do you do when you go downstairs in the middle of the night and see your VCR floating in the middle of the living room? Run and cower in fear in this seemingly impossible situation.

I get more excited then my dog when I give her a treat

Justin Bieber.

How do you call a hispanic man crossing the border? First you must find out his phone number, then using a different phone make a phone call to him.

knock knock who's there? Orange Oranges cant talk, so seriously, who's there Your mother Ha ha real funny -mother opens door with her key-

Roses are black, Violets are black, Trees are black, WHO BURNT MY GARDEN?!

What happened the homeless guy's home? A meteor fell on it.

What did the wife say to the husband? I'm a man.

I going to the kitchen to make a #sandwich.....oh wait this isn't twitter

Nickleback.

What did the pineapple say to the cucumber? Nothing...the pineapple was incapable of speech, for twas only an infant.

Why do all black people have AIDS? Because they deserve it.

Knock, knock. Who's there? You. You who? You should be drug out into the street and shot. Whoever you are, I will find you.

I like cookies... GIVE ME ICE CREAM.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was persecuted for his faith.

A blind man walks into a bar----b wire

Why wasn't Will invited to the party? Will has been dead for 3 years.

a black hispanic and asian man jump off a cliff they all die and their families morn their deaths

2 men walk into a bar without thier shirts. They get kicked out. 2 women walk into a bar without thier shirts They got beaten almost to death Why? The men dressed up as women, and every hated them so much they beat the almost to death when 2 cops walk into that bar, see the men dressed up as women and they too beat them. Little do they all know that the men disguised as women are really secret goverment agents looking into a drug deal. The drug dealers got away and now we have 2 people sueing the police department and drugs on the street again. Oh yeah I almost forgot: I made this up so if you read it you're going to die withing the next 100000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 years. I gurantee it. If you dont the men in white coats are going to do extremely painful tests on you and you just might die so then no one will care and maybe get onto thier lives again. Why did I right this? It hasnt happened to me so I dont know If you tell me I will give you something more valueble than gold. Want to know what it is? TELL ME FIRST!!!!

why bouriquet can not read is book ? cause he's retarted

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, didn't you read the sign on the front door? It says, "People with suits on will not be served." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

yo momma so stupid she should probably be taken to a specialist as she may have a learning disability.

Why are women so obsessed with not having penises? I'm serious. Imagine an ordinary woman out there, who is not doing any of the activities that the women-not-having-penises thing is famous for. But I can pretty much guarantee that under her clothes at that very moment, she isn't having a penis. And for no good reason. Sometimes I suspect women keep up the no-penis thing even in their sleep. Frankly, I find that creepy. Why are women so obsessed with not having penises?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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