Dad, why are we Swedish? Because antilopes and the butterfly effect son.

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What did the black man say to the other black man? Nothing, he was recently involved in a terrible car accident which he barely survived but lost the function of speech and was paralysed from the neck downwards. He is constantly in pain and desperately wants someone to kill him but has no way of communicating this so is forced to wait until his natural death.

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I'm so hungry I could eat a well prepared meal!

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Women's rights

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what do you call a woman who has sex for money? smart.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it could not afford sandals.

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knock, knock who's there owls owls who thats right owls who

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What do potatoes wear to bed? Potatoes don't sleep and don't wear clothes.

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side.

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what did the man say to his dog? sex. -teagan doherty

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What's under there? I'm not falling for that one...

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Why did the man talk to the potato? Because hes stupid.

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Why was bobby late for school? Because he drove off a bridge.

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Whats faster than a black guy with a TV? His brother with a VCR.

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What's the difference between a corvette and a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies is a horrible tragedy.

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Where's my tractor?

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hey timmy, wanna go to Disneyworld?! tough. *10 seconds later* still no timmy

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Why are tests such a pain in the ass? Because your vomiting shit you'd learned the night before.

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What KFC? Deep fried aborted babies.

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What do Sylvia Plath and a cake have in common? Nothing.

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People made fun of a plant for walking into a bar. Little did they know it hadn't been watered for days.

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wioFUrwny1c

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

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why did the Chinese man fail the driving test because he had no previous driving experience and wasn't prepared for the test

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops