why did the semen cross the road? i wore the wrong sock today.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Poop!!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up which puts resistance on his arms and therefore strengthens his arm muscles and performs physical exercise.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do accountants do when they're constipated? Take a laxative and eat plenty of fiber.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Knock Knock! Who's there? Your neighbor. Ok, Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

There once was a baby named Paul Bunyan who was as big as a house. His mother died at childbirth.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Friends are a lot like trees... ...they fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's big and hairy my penis just kidding It's Bigfoot

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How many babiess it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Did you hear about the alter boy that wasn't molested by a priest?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call a black man walking towards you with a gun? A defibrillator.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: What do you call it when you get shot in the face 20 times with a shotgun? A:Nothing, you're dead. Q:What do we call it when you get shot 20 times with a shotgun? A: A blessing.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q. How many babies does it take to paint a room? A. Depends on how hard you throw them.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's worse than a worm in your apple? A worm in your heart.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Have you seen stevie wonders new house No Niether has he

thumb_up thumb_down -3

In Soviet Russia it's pretty cold.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Alzheimer. Who?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's yellow and can't swim? A tractor.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

so a blonde walks into a bank, opens her purse, pulls out her check and cashes it. She then returns to her car and proceeds home.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: What did one muffin say to the other muffin? A: "AAAA! A TALKING MUFFIN!"

thumb_up thumb_down -3

why did the bus hit the kid? he dropped his ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Can a rabbit jump higher than a tree? No. Trees don't jump

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? George Bush

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops