What's the difference between a black man and a Jew? Their ancestral heritage

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Wanna see me count to ten? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10.

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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Roses are blue, Violets are red, Wait, what? huh

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How does santa deliver presents? He doesn't, because he's not real!

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There was a lil girl in a red hoody skipping to her grandma's house. When she got there she noticed her grandma wasn't home. The lil girl panics and see's a wolf. She hesitates and asks the wolf "Have you seen my grandma" The wolf replies with a yes, shes in the backyard planting flowers.

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A black guy and his black girlfriend are in a car. Who's driving? Their driver. The black guy has a very prosperous career and their life is at the envy of many.

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Imagine a scenario Add a Rhubarb Crumble into your scenario Add your mother and father sitting together watching the news in your scenario. Your scenario should take place in an old people's home Add an Olympic athlete doing the splits into your scenario If there were any crane-flies in your scenario, be sure to subtract them at once. Divide your scenario by two. Your scenario should now be a mental image of flying horses and a hippopotamus eating a large salmon mousse. There will be a pig tied to a pair of sunglasses.

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You Obviously Lack Originiality YOLO.

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After thinking hard for a very long time, the pig realized he was a fat, worthless piece of shit.

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What would you call the Flintstones if they were black? You would still call them the Flintsones

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David Silberberg is gay

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Why was the comedian so funny? Because that's his job, and if he wasn't funny he would have to become a hobo.

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you know you are a prostatute when your report car is full of Ds

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Why can't Stephen Hawking run a marathon? Because it takes years of hard training to accomplish such a remarkable feat.

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why did the girl fall down someone threw four monkeys and a refrigerator at her

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What's better than getting second place in the paralympics? Having legs.

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Why is my son so unhappy? Because I beat his mother violently in front of him

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What you do you call a gay man with no arms and legs? His name.

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Beth got an aunt farm for her birthday.

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What is blue and flies across the room? A baby with a punctured lung.

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...................__ ............./´¯/'...'/´¯¯`·¸ ........../'/.../..../......./¨¯\ ........('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...') .........\.................'...../ ..........''...\.......... _.·´ ............\..............( BroFist

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whoa there

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Why did they use the phone as a football? Because it was a phone-ball.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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