- Anti Joke

Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

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A deer looks at the ground and sees something strange. He wonders what it could be. A rabbit comes along and thinks the same. A badger promptly arrives after the rabbit and thinks the exact same. 4 seconds later they all get hit by a train.

On September 11th 2001, A worker of North twin tower man woke up to find his dog had chewed on his brand new phone. He went down stairs and realized his kitchen window had been broken. Getting ready to leave for work and saw his radio had been stolen out of his car. After finally making it to work and settling down in his office he spilled coffee on his lap. Enraged, the man yelled, "How could today get any worse!?"

A young black guy was explaining how he was raised by a single mother

a guy walks into a bar.. ouch

Why did the chicken cross the road? It is not a sentient animal and is unaware of the dangers it will face.

What did the bird say to the other bird? Nothing because birds can't talk.

What do you call a midget mixed with a T. rex? Dinosaurs are dead and this is a highly un probable situation. Therefore, I do not know.

What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? A pizza is an Italian food and a jew is a human that practices the Jewish faith

Three men stumble upon an ancient lamp in the desert. They sell it to a museum and split the profit evenly.

How many black men does it take to change a light bulb? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE!

why did the elephant cross the road? It was the chickens day off

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

why did the kitten drink its milk? because it doesnt have a motor so has no need for petrol.

What do you call a black person who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

The dog, Marley from Marley and Me. It died.

Q: What do you say to a person in a wheelchair who fall downs the stairs? A: Nothing because most likely they would take an elevator.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Living in Africa.

Knock knock. Who's there? We are members of the church of Jesus Christ of latter day saints.

What did the man say after he was shot? Nothing, because the bullet hit the man with so much impact that he instantly died and was unable to talk at the current time. Others in the surrounding area walked by as if nothing was there.

How do you stop a baby from crawling circles? You nail it's other hand to the floor too

After going at it for several minutes, the teenager, with a big grin in his face, finally busted a nut during Thanksgiving dinner and was able to remove the walnut from its shell and enjoy it.

a white man, an asian man, and a mexican man are on a plane and they realize how inefficient the airline was in filling the flight, seeing as there were only three men on board.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops