Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

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Knock-Knock Whos there? You You who? Yoohoo! is anybody home?!! Well obviously or i wouldn't have talked to you. Idiots these days!

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A black man walks into a store with a ski mask on... what does he do?? he buys skiis.

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Roses are red, violets are blue When I cut you, you bleed

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey has a very weak cerrebellum.

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A man walks into a bar, he then proceeds to purchase his favorite alcoholic beverage.

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A kid walks into the car and the dad says, "Wear your seatbelt".

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What's worse than finding a worm on your apple? Trench foot on your eyebrow.

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Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

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What happens when you turn the TV on? You watch it.

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Roses are red, and blood is too. But violets are purple. NOT FUCKING BLUE.

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What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

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A- 2 jews walk in a bar..what happed? B- they died 35 years later from skin cancer

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What is a gremlin's favorite snack? Gremlins aren't real.

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What happened to the boy who stalked the pretty girl? His father raped him and he died in a house fire induced by his overwhelmingly sick love for the taliban

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What do you call your mother's bipolar brother with three arms? Uncle.

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Jim just got laid off at the office. He believes his life is going to hell, so he commits suicide. His wife then later was blamed for his death because they were having many arguments. She was sentenced to life and slowly rotted in prison for the rest of her life. Their children then are moved around from foster home to foster home and they grow up to be drug dealers.

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¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯ ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ _________________________________________ That's a road. Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot that made this joke, me. And what did the idiot do? He ate it with barley. There was food poisoning. Where did the idiot's vomit go? In yo poo.

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Homeless man....it's what's for dinner!

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A black woman and a white woman are in a bar. They don't talk to each other though because they don't know each other. THE END.

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Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms knock knock who's there? Not little Suzie.

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Did you hear about the Australian man who was jumped by a gang of Americans with knifes? He had his cash and possessions stolen from him, and had to spend two weeks in hospital due to stab wounds.

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why didn't the chicken cross the road? It was very unhealthy, and had a heart attack attempting too

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96

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops