What do you call an old lady walking down the street? Widowed.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Jet fuel doesn't melt steel beams,heat does.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

took my chevy to the levy but the levy was dry

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's worse than hitting your funny bone? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why was the man foolish for buying a new lamp? Because he lived in a small shack with no electricity and was probably going to die soon.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A: You murder her friends and family.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the man walk into the grocery store? Because he had run out of peanut butter

thumb_up thumb_down -13

josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why couldn't the emo kid finish reading his book? Because he was on the titanic when it sank.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: What do you call a black person who got hit by a truck? A: Dead

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the weiner dog that punctured Doris' bladder get carried away during an oral sex session? Because the dog had a terribly troubled childhood which led to a faliure to adequately function in adulthood

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a black man driving a plane? You don't call it anything. You don't drive a plane you fly it.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why was the black man running? He has to stay fit for the army.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the douche bag get for Christmas?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

I don't often drink beer, but when I do, I make the poor decision to attempt to drive while intoxicated, kill a pedestrian, and end up in jail with a hangover, a DUI, and an account of vehicular homicide. Don't drink and drive simultaneously.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What is brown and green and goes 100 mph? A tree falling down on your house.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a big house full of dead people? My family

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Knock knock Who's there Evan Evan who Evans erectile area is largo with Sarah plains pudding

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the Chinese man do with the sick dog he found in the alleyway? He took it to the vet, nursed it back to health, and later helped the dog get adopted by a nice family down the street.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

One afternoon, a man walks into a bar, looking sad and purchases a large drink. "Bad day?" the bartender asks, "I just found out my youngest son is gay." the man replies. "Wow that's bad buddy, I'll buy you the drink, on the house." Two weeks later, the same man walks into a bar, looking sad and purchases a large drink. "Bad day?" the bartender asks, "I just found out my second son is gay." the man replies. "Wow that's bad buddy, I'll buy you the drink, on the house." Two weeks later, the same man walks into a bar, looking sad and purchases a large drink. "Bad day?" the bartender asks, "I just found out my oldest son is gay." the man replies. "Doesn't anyone in your family like women?." the bartender asks. The man thinks about it. "Yeah, my wife."

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Last week, one of my ex girlfriends called me. She said she had to tell me some bad news. "I don't know how to tell you this but I have AIDS. I really didn't know how to reply to that so I said the only thing I could say. "Yeah, I know."

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops