how many people does it take to change a light bulb....... none..................its stilll bright

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun. Get in the van

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Why did the girl go to Jupiter? To get more stupider

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What's worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice

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Have you heard of the Armenian genocide? No? Me neither.

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Wilson: would you buy lottery when you grow up Mattuew: no theres no point Wilson: ask Xiangxi right next to you Mattuew: xiangxi, would you buy lottery if you grow up? Xiangxi: Prabably not, because the chance of winning a lottery is lower than becoming an astronaut Mattuew: the probability of you winning the lottery is higher than you finding a girlfriend

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what did the robber say to lady gaga to get her in the car?get in the car or i shoot you i just want your money!!

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Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like funny jokes but I tend to ruin the punchline by just talking too much and that's probably why no one likes me and...

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Superman and Batman get in a fight, who wins? No one the world has just lost a superhero.

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give me a gun or i will shoot you i dont know what with but i will kill you so run run or i will come and get you

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Chuck Norris was so good at karate that he held the middle weight world title for 6 years and was named fighter of the year by Black Belt Magazine. He also used his talents to start a successful acting and advertising career.

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Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. They all broke beyond repair.

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What did hitler say to the jacket potato? Your fucked now!

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How many types of pure breed dogs are there in the world? 701

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AntiJoke will not let me type this so I will add some spaces. N I G G E R.

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Why was the trucker making noises? It was having sex with someone

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A fake pizza delivery guy goes to a party and tries to deliver DiGornios pizza in another companys pizza box. The party host calls the police and the guy gets charged for stealing another companys uniform and impersonating a pizza palace worker. He had to return the uniform.

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a dog jumping up and catching a frisbi

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Why does Greg steal? Because he is a thief He is also scouse!

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What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

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A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

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why did the boat crash? a tomato was driving

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Can a rabbit jump higher than a tree? Trees can't jump

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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