What does a dishwasher and the holocaust have in common? Not much.

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A black man, a mexican man, and a caucasian man, walk into a bar with handguns. The three break out into a gun fight and everyone is killed in the cross-fire

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Why is the baby not crying? Because it died of herpes. JUST KIDDING! Babies can't get herpes.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky, It hit one of the random green pipes.

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Why do dead Republicans float? Their corpse's mass-to-volume ratio is less than the water they displace. It is very sad.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one says "Boy, it sure is hot in here." The second one says "Holly shit! A talking muffin!" As muffins generally don't talk.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

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Why was the man denied access to the college Because he did not have good grades in the past.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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A construction worker walks into a bar. Lucky he was wearing his hard hat.

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky? Someone shot it.

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Why doesn't the farmer have a dog? He doesn't like dogs.

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What's the difference between 10,000 dead babies and a Farari? I don't have a Farari in my garage.

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why do you kill people in call of duty you don't you kill computer made figures

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Why did the blonde girl drink lots of water? Because the fat comments got to her and she changed her diet to nothing but water

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What's white and sticky.... Jizz

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Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary

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Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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1234567890? ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ

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daughter and boyfriend havin sex baby baby baby ohhh!! mum walks in; what you doin signin to justin bieber,oh ok just make sure you dont sing to his song its crap!!!!!!!

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ASUS Live Update has stopped working.

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Hey I just meet you. And this is crazy, but im a Zombie. And you looks tasty!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I tryed to hang myself But my neck qad to fat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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