What did the girl tell her abusive boyfriend Girl: You broke my heart! Boyfriend: I'm gonna break your face.

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What happens when a toad is struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

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Q: What's big, yellow and can't swim? A: A school bus full of children.

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dat shoe shine tho

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A guy walks into a bar and finds a genie. The genie says he'll grant him 3 wishes. He wished for a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. POOF! All 3 wishes were granted to him. The blonde drinks a shot a tequila, the brunette drinks a beer, and the redhead drinks a whiskey. They had a great time.

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A very rich man had a daughter whom all of the men in town wanted to marry her for wealth. Except there was one man who wanted to marry her due to his love for her. The father let his daughter marry whomever she wanted from all of the men in town, and she chose a man named Wilson Fremblington who wanted to marry her for wealth, because he was physically fit and overall a friendly man.

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why did the plane crash ? Because a loaf of brad was flying it, and Loaves of bread don't fly planes

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A baby walks into a bar, not long before it leaves out of the bar.

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he just got paralized from the waist down and will never be able to walk again.

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knock knock whos there I AM YOUR MOTHER!!!!

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Why did the Mexican steal a pack of tortillas? To feed his family. He didn't have the necessary funds to pay for it.

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what happens when you put Rihanna and Chris brown in the same room? Rihanna dies

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse's mother had terminal cancer

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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Why Are Parking Lines White? - So You Can See Them...

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once upon a time a guy thought he wrote an original anti joke but it wasnt

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a irish man walks past a bar

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I GOT YOUR BUTT PUSSY!

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what is your moms favorite website? Wait did I say mom. Oh I'm not very sorry.

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Why did Marilyn Manson surgically remove 2 ribs from his body? To suck his own penis.

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What is exceptionally dangerous? Shaving while taking a bath, because the risk of electrocution is extremely high.

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hello i hav a growing interes in math and arithmetic especially when it involves pi if u are still reading this you either didnt realize that this was a joke or just didnt care but most likely it means that the first line interested or bored u and u wanted to find out wut the rest was u like????

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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