A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face" The horse responds "My daughter has cancer"

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There was a man posting an anti-joke... He had no life

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It didn't.

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A Texan, a Mexican, a Brit and a Frenchman are on a plane that begins having engine trouble. The black box was never found.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names

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I used to be into necrophilia, bestiality, and sado-masochism; but then I realized I was just beating a dead horse.

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A man walks into a store. He purchases what he was intending to, walks out, and gets on with his day.

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Why couldn't the blond get into the library? Because the library was closed therefore the door was locked.

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There's a donut on a cruise ship and he goes up to the captain and he's like "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain goes "nope, come back tomorrow" so the next day the donut goes up to the captain and says "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain replies "nope, come back tomorrow" so the next day the donut goes up to the captain and he's like "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain says "NO!" and throws him over board Theres a couple on the cruise ship and the man was going to have a romantic dinner with his girlfriend and propose. So he was showing his bestfriend (who was also on the cruise ship) the ring. But was he pulled it out the wind picked up and the ring fell over board. So the man was forced to have a romantic dinner with his girlfriend and couldn't propose. So they go to dinner and the both get crab. And when they open up the crab and guess what's in the crab?! Not the ring the donut!!!

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Q: Why were minorities denied access to the bathroom? A: It was for employees only.

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Q:What did the turtle say to the jaguar? A: Well, a turtle and a jaguar live in totally different habitats, turtles live in water while jaguars live in grasslands, so it would be unlikely for them to cross paths and communicate. Turtles and jaguars are unable to speak and, if a jaguar were to talk to a turtle, the turtle would be unable to make out words because turtles can only pick up vibrations. And, they would have nothing to talk about.

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What do you call a black man that steals a VCR? My Grandpa, he was a Vietnam vet

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i saw amango it splootered

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What was sandusky's role at penn state turned tight ends into wide receivers

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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How come Tommy isn't allowed to sing anymore? Because he has a punctured artery, collapsed lung, fractured ribcage, and a failed organ...

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"What's your name?" "Josephine." "Josephine?" "No, Josephine." "That's what I said." "I know,"

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Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

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Why was the cancer patient often bullied by his peers? Because he happened to be an extremely bad person. He often annoyed people, was intransigent and often aggravated those around him causing them to bully him.

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How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None. They just beat it for being black.

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Interviewer: Are you currently a smoker? Applicant: Are you implying that I look like a chimney?

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Why does the Easter Bunny hide his eggs? So nobody finds he's been fucking hens.

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The last person on Earth is sitting home alone when suddenly there is a knock at the door. Knock knock Who's there? *silence* Damn this joke got creepy...

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Once there was an egg by the name of Steve. His name was Steve the Egg.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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