What did the caterpillar say when he emerged from his chrysalis? I am a butterfly.

What's green and has wheels? The White House. I lied about everything, I'm so sorry.

what do u call a lesbian dinosaur? lickalotopuss

Wanna hear a good joke? Sure. So does Hellen Keller

Q:What is your maturity on a scale of 1 to 100? A:69

Two pen state administrators walk into a butt

Why was the baby crying? Because he was tied to a railroad track. How did the baby die? He had a bomb strapped to him. How did the bomb explode? It got ran over by a train.

A man walks into me and I say: "WATCH IT PUNK!"

How do u get high, meet a leprachaun, and touch a rainbow? U find a leprechaun shoot him, steal his pot, and run up the rainbow silly!

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

Santa Claus is so hairy he need to shave more often.

Why do eggs come in 12? because 13 is bad luck

A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

What's got 2 thumbs and a massive penis? A body parts collector I know called Harold Fortescue

What do you get when you see a black man writing? A man devoted to getting a education.

What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

What did the muslim do at the airport? He bought a ticket to New York and proceeded to fly there to mourn his brother who was killed during the terrorist attacks on 9/11.

Q. What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A. Cancer

Knock knock whose there alzheimers alzheimers who get in the van

One time there was a guy who jumped off a bridge and died

A clown walking down the steet, trips -Ryan Vallee

What bouriquet got to do open HIS FACEBOOK!

"bluar blah blah blarRR/ the stupid pointless part" dead people/ animals/ objects can't talk/ drive/ operate compueter, lol I'm so focken funni

What human can fly without holding any thing (exept cloths i dont like inapropeate jokes i dont know it a very intresting quesiton

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...