How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Q: Why was the little boy late for school? A: His face was stapled to a wall.

Why did Julie fall off a swing? 'Cause she had no hands. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Julie, that's certain.

Two muffins are sitting in a oven, The other muffin says to the other muffin nothing, Because muffins are unable of human conversation.

a black guy a mexican guy and a puerto rican guy are driving together in a car whos driving? Whoevers car it is.

Who looks like Justin bieber, and is really cool? Justin Bieber, but I lied about him being cool.

Good friends are like snowflakes. They disappear when you pee on them.

Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who's driving? The taxi driver.

Knock knock Who's there? Fuk Fuk who?

i remember when i was a child i wanted a skateboard but my parents would never buy me one so late one night i crept downstairs and got a hammer and some wood and i beat them to death my foster parents baught me 5 skateboards

he took my chicken i shoot him in the foot and raped his dog

Why did the plane crash? Because something was wrong with the engine

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a semi.

"Knock-knock." "Come in, sorry that the doorbell is broken."

"I see London; I see France..." "Wow. You must have exceptional eyesight."

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. The fight began and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing you say when you don't want to fight anymore and you let the other person win?" The other guy says to the challanger, "I give up?" Then the challenger yells. "I WIN!"

What is the difference between my pet goldfish and an african village? My pet goldfish has water.

Why did the man cross the road? Because the light was red!

What do you tell a women with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice..

Whats Brown and Sticky A) a stick

"My dog doesn't have a nose" "How does it smell?" "It can't. It bled to death."

bangers and mash?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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