What do an airplane and a grape have in common? They both have wings, except the grape.

Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

Q. What did the blond say when she woke up? A. I don"t know. I wasn't there.

your skull would make a nice pen holder

What's better than winning a gold medal in the Paralympics ? Not being disabled

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

why did the man beat his wife? why not?

Why does the kid cries when he sees me? Cuz i took his lollypop last week.

What do you do when you see a plumbers crack. Tell him he has another crack to fill

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well, neither has he.

Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's. Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's.

What do Alzheimer patients think of the internet. Happy pi day.

-I have an idea! Let's play twenty questions! -Alright! But i have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer caught it.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Knock knock. Whos there? I am you dumbass im standing right next to you.

Have you heard the one about the fat woman and the dead baby? The woman was actually pregnant, not fat, and just had a miscarriage.

What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

the other day i was walking down the street and saw a black man carrying a tv. i thought to myself, "hey that looks like mine!" but then i was like nawwwwwww, mine's at home...... shining my shoes -_-

knock knock whos there? andy andy who? andy gold hi come in

How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

what is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 11 dead babies in a trash can

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...