so today, i was walking along, and i noticed that it was sunny outside.

Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are powerful machines, capable of dismemberment and death when wielded by someone who wishes to cause harm

Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

What's more irritating than a half eaten apple? Some prick taking up half the page with shitty copy and past routine.

A man walks into a bar He wakes up from his coma 21 years later and learns that humans now serve pumpkins as gods.

When black people wore their pants low, white people called it "Saggin" little did they know that "saggin" spelled backwards is "white supremacy" those sneaky white people

What do you call a black man standing on a podium? Slave trade

What's oily and smells like smegma? Kevin Crummy

why didnt the guy go to work one morning he died in a car accident

A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks: dude, what happened to your eye? The man replies: abuse.

your mom is so fat, that your father is no longer attracted to her and it is tearing your family apart.

For 10 cents a day you can feed an African...they eat pennies.

Jake pulled out a gun and held it to his head, planning to fool his friends because he knew the gun was empty. Then his friend thought he was helping out his suicidal friend by stabbing him.

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse being a horse and doesnt understand english is confused and scared by its surroundings it gallops away knocking over a few tables.

Why was the unemployed dolphin trainer so sad? His life has no purpoise. In an unrelated topic, how is he unemployed id he is a dolphin trainer?

Q: The red house is to the left and the blue house is to the right. Where is the white house? A: 3 blocks down from the red house

What's the worst part about eating a dead baby? It's a tie between the smell, the taste, and the depression associated with whatever decline in humanitsy that has brought you to this point in your life. Overall, it's an outright terrible situation.

Dylan F is stupid He goes to his cousins house Then falls into a pit Moves on

I just wrote three jokes on antijoke.com ... nope, make that four.

How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

Q. How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? A. Who knows? It's dark!

What do you call a white guy pointing a gun at someone? A member of the United States Army.

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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