How many friendzoned guys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. They just compliment it then get mad when it won't screw.

A man walks into a bar. The second man sees the first man's mistake and ducks. The third man needs to take no precautions as he is a midget and can simply walk under the bar.

A prostitution ring operates out of a subway. How much does the prostitute with a foot long penis cost? About $300, for a 12 inch penis is very rare and desirable.

Why couldn't Jack and Jill climb the hill? Because they were bagels.

A cricket walks into a bar and the bartender says,"Hey, we have a drink named after you!' and the cricket says,"Oh really? You have a drink named Joe?"

What did the man say when he lost his keys? I lost my keys. What did the man say when he saw an elephant in the distance? There is an elephant in the distance.

There was once a little boy who started feeling sick. His mother gave him some soup. He died anyway.

Why did Jimmy's grandma never come home ? Her liver failed .

Why did Bob drop his ice cream? Because he got hit with a super models TIttys

Ask me if I'm a truck! Are you a truck?! No.

What do you call Batman and Robin after they have been run over by a car? Dead.

What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

Why couldnt Hellen Keller drive? Because vehicles werent invented yet.

Your momma smells so bad that she purchased arm and hammer products to improve upon her natural scent.

How did the baby die? In a very sad and tragic car accident.

Two muffins are in an oven. And by muffins I mean jews. They both die a horrible death.

A man walked into a bar. He was accused of being to drunk to drive so someone called a cab for him and he was forced to leave.

whats big red and eats bricks a big red brick eater

what do you call 10 black people in a red car? overcrowded

what is funnier than 24.....?????? 69. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. IT IS FUNNY BECAUSE IT LOOKS LIKE ME AND YOUR MAMA

Was the last joke funny? Because this one isn't.

theres no 'I' in 'team' but theres an 'I' in 'hitler'

What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot you racist S.O.B.

What is red? A rock painted red

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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