What do you call a black man playing a bass guitar? A bassist.

Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

How man people does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1 an electrician

Why did the boy fall off the swing? -Because he didn't have any arms!

Q: What would you think if a homeless person asked, "Spare change for drugs and cigarettes?" A: At least he was being honest.

Where does Charlie Sheen buy his clothes? Winners

Click here for free sandwich.

Knock knock! I'm in the shower, i'll be there in 5 minutes

What did the little boy say to a stranger? Nothing. He is very shy, and his parents always said to never talk to strangers.

A gay man goes out with a butch lesbian and develops a loving relationship, years later they get married and have kids, adopting them from the local orphanage and lives happily ever after.

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

What did the plane say to the world Trade Center on 9/11? Nothing a plane is an object therefore cannot talk.

Knock knock Who's there Guess who? Billy, is that you? Yeah baby I'm home! OMG!!!

Brenda said she found a pill to stop the effects of aging! It was a cyanide pill, Brenda is dead.

Q. what tall and looks like a jew? A.TODD

Anyone can post anything.

I'm rick james bitch

Your mother is so fat that she will likely eventually develop diabetes.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I can not rhyme, Show me your tits

when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

What did the sad man say to the happy man? He didn't say anything he was so sad he killed himself.

Jack wasn't nimble. Jack wasn't quick. Jack sat on the candle and burned his corduroys.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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