What did the Firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire.... - Let's go home.

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Why did the pencil break? A Viking destroyed it with his beard.

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What do you call a black man with no arms? Trustworthy.

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what do michael Jackson and little boys do in the dark alone? they turn on the flashlight

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In Soviet Russia... ...there are many buildings and landmarks for the viewing.

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Whats 9 plus 10? 19

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What did the girl say before she jumped a bridge? "Do you think I can jump off this bridge?"

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Interviewer: Are you currently a smoker? Applicant: Are you implying that I look like a chimney?

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The teacher asked: If you have two apples, and I give you two, how many do you have now? FOUR said the student.

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Knock Knock Who's there? You have AIDS.

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What's 9+10? 19

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What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Why didn't Susie do her reading homework? She is blind and her school system cannot Afford to teach her to read braille

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Yo mama so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death

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A black woman and a white woman are in a bar. They don't talk to each other though because they don't know each other. THE END.

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Ask me what my favorite color is. What's you favorite color? Blue.

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A frog walks up to Steve, and says "Hey, Steve." Steve is terrified because a frog knows his name, and is walking.

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A: Knock knock. B: Come in. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ?cash(p)

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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A guy dared his friend to jump off a bridge for 10 bucks. His friend, fearing for his life did not jump.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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how did the homeless man die? He got stabbed

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What happened when the man asked the girl if he could borrow her pencil? Nothing, she was deaf

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Hey, I want to because you are really sweet and deserve it, and damn you are hot, but thats secondary in your case, in every case actually, otherwise I would just be doing it with meat whose soul and thoughts I hate/dislike/detest/etc, and that is not who I am. Once huh? I mean I said night/day/shower/breakfast table... Not so sure I can last for that long with a girl as hot and sweet as you for that long. Kidding, hey, best friend huh? Wow, I mean that`s really sweet, and you are really a special friend to me, but uh, to be honest, best friend? I barely know you... I hate this part of myself, I am blunt with that honesty thing, I may just have insulted you, but you know, I also need to be able to live with myself If I am going to enjoy life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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