What did the tree say to the kite? She got hit by a fridge.

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Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Holy shit! I can talk too!"

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The rabbit owns a small business and has trouble getting a loan.

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why did the blond get and abortion? because she was forcefully raped by her 42 year old boy friend and felt she could not raise a child on her own.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Q.A zebra somehow managed to get out of the zoo and started running all around the town. After some time he saw a zebra crossing(not an original zebra crossing the road but the black and white stripes)on the road.He stoppped suddenly.WHY? A. He was too tired to run any more!!!

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It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Why did the English man walk into a bar? Do get an alcoholic beverage to temporarily forget the pain of his recent divorce.

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How do you make a baby stop crying? You throw it out the window.

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Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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What's worse than the WNBA? The Cleveland Cavaliers.

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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What's under there? I'm not falling for that one...

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Hai Patrick Hai Patrick

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What does a black guy get for Christmas? Everything you own

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What are the similarites between Autistic people and dead people? They are both very poor in social situations

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Ask me about my wiener. How's your wiener? I don't have a wiener, I'm a woman.

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What makes Amish bread different than regular bread? It's made by Amish people

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You!!!!!! Cause your whole existence is just one big joke.

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If you want to make the little things count, teach midgets maths!

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Whats worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant monkey

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What do you call a black man with a gun a soldier who is fighting for his country

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HAVE A GOOD DAY. DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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