what did the stop sign say to the car? nothing.

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What did the dinosaur say to the human? For one, dinosaur's don't talk. And two, humans were not roaming the Earth during this time.

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Paul was mowing his lawn when he felt a bump. It turned out it was a bunny. Paul felt bad but the bunny felt worse

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Yes you better be sorry, I'm gonna suck my mums p e n i s tonight! - Dylan Hodge

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What do call something that looks exactly like a turtle but is not a turtle? A picture of a turtle

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A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

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Q: Why did the man eat the banana? A: Cuz he was hungry!

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Bang Bang Get the hell out of the house, it's on fire.

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what's worse than waiting 45 minutes in an amusement park ride? getting your penis chopped off.

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A duck walks into a bar- nope, just chuck testa...

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How do you punish Helen Keller You don't, she's dead

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Whats the difference between obama and Michael Jackson? Michael Jackson Is dead

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What's long hard and black A drain pipe

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NASA sent a probe to Uranus and wondered why people were laughing.

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What do you call a guy with a rubber toe? . . . . . . . Roberto

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Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

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What do you call a black man running really fast down a street? Active.

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Why didn't the cat play with the ball of yarn? It was drowned in a toilet.

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When Chuck Norris claps, his two hands slam together, creating rather loud soud.

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DONT think about ELEPHANTS. Your thinking about elephants now.

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what do you do when you see a black man punching a girl? act like you dont see it and get the hell out of harms way

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how to name your chinese kid. throw a spoon dow the stairs

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your titties super glued to a triceritops' as cheeks while the triceritops has chronic diahrea

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A Matthew walks into a room. Everyone left. This is not a joke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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