The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

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Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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Why did Bill correct Matt when he called him Jim? Because that wasn't his name.

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Why was the boy sad? Because a freak accident killed his mum his dad his best friend and he lost both his legs and is unable to feed himself

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An anti-Semite, a Jew and an American walked into the bar. The barman said: "Hi, Sara".

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What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky? It had no wings.

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Roses are black Violets are black I would love to see A knife in ur back

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A man rode into town on Friday and came out on Friday how did he manage this? He stayed for a couple of hours

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how did the black guy get into school? he walked thru the front door.

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What do you do if your walking into a room full of Lions and Jaguars? You stop walking.

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you pick up 10 students from a school, you buy a pish from the fet store, and then drive to new york whos driving the bus? a fat guy with a level 80 org in world of warcraft

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woman's lacrosse

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How did Whitney huston die? By eating a turkey sasandwich and then put a car jump starter in the bath tub.

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"Good Morning, I'm Dr. Pepper" "Like the drink?" "Huh... yes... just like the drink" Would you mind to sit right here Mr..... "Nike" "Oh, just like the shoes" "How do you dare!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why can't a chicken cross a road without it being questioned?

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Where did the little boy go on vacation? His mother's funeral.

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Q: Why was little Timmy afraid of clowns? A: The one at his birthday party killed his parents.

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The next person to submit a 'roses are red' 'joke', is cursed to always prematurely ejaculate from here until eternity

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Anal

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A man was struck by lightning. What did you think he got super powers or something? No. He died a horrible death

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What's worse than having a retarded baby? Not having a baby

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops