Roses are red, Violets are blue, i thought violets were violet. hmph.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

When Chuck Norris does a push up, he's working out.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Wenis Penis

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you get when you cross a sheep with a lion? A dead sheep.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What does the kid with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A: arms and legs

thumb_up thumb_down -4

chuck norris's daughter lost her virgenatie but he got it back

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I like my coffee like i like my women ... With big titys

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the lactose intolerant boy say when he accidentally drank some milk? Nothing, he went into anaphylactic shock and couldn't breathe.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Micael Jackson enters a bar. Everyone screams, and then someone runs over and pulls the cheap mask off the impersonator's face. Michael Jackson IS DEAD, get over it

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor

thumb_up thumb_down -4

ROSE ARE BROWN VIOLETS ARE BROWN WHO SH*IT IN MY GARDEN!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: What does a giraffe say to the other giraffes? A: Nothing, giraffes do not have vocal cords and are therefore unable to make any sounds, much less speak; not to mention a giraffes brain is far to underdeveloped to talk in a spoken language.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have five fingers, The middle one's for you.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: Whats white and fluffy? A: White fluff

thumb_up thumb_down -4

this website is a bad joke

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did the girl fall off the swing..? because she became unbalanced and the force of gravity extended on her was too great to prevent the fall

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what did the fish say when i threw it at the wall. Ouch. Then the world ended because it caused a ripple in the fabric of reality.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop? Depends. Are you applying a lot of pressure and licking in short, round bursts, or are you softly suckling on the treat? Your mouth's pH level is also a determining factor, as the sucker digests at a quicker rate the higher the acid content. To put it simply, there is no correct answer, because the sheer quantity of variables makes it a tootsie-less endeavor. See how I said tootsie-less rather than fruitless? Now that's a real joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

whats sad about a bus full of blacks driving over a cliff? the driver was white

thumb_up thumb_down -4

FUCK YOU SAY FUCK YOU SAY SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH THATS WHAT I FUCKING SAID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Even dyslexic people attend church and pray to Dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What is green and looks like a blue car? A Green car

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? A:They both take turns, because they are driving across the country and it would be hard for one of them to drive the entire way.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really angry. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds and it better be there!!" The next morning he got up early and told his wife to come to the driveway. He quickly pulled out a .44 Magnum and murdered her violently. The marriage had been a nightmare ever since they lost their unborn child, and the situation pushed Bob to a place, where he could no longer look at his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops