Gay rights.

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When life gives you lemons, Life isn't actually a person so saying that would be irrelevant

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Jehovas Witnesses: Summer vacation edition reality show: BItch: Do you know Jesus? Guy: Goddammit you A*Beep*SSHOLES again! I keep telling you all this is m0thertrucking Spain, I know like 500 Jesus`s living in this town alone! *slams door* Moral: Everybody knows at least something about the goddamn Jesus! Ill try asking "Is he the guy that lives downstairs?" Next time and see what happens.

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why did the shark bite the surf board? It thought it was turtle.

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Why was the pizza mad? Because he was going thorough a growth spurt and the testosterone got to him.

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Three explorers are walking through the jungle when they are suddenly captured by a group of cannibals, the cannibals, going through years of culture and hereditary custom, kill the explorers, skin their bodies, chop them to pieces and cook their flesh, finally they eat it giving them a prosperous feast while the rest of the world is unaware of whatever happened in that jungle.

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what do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? a stick

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Q: How do you make an onion cry? A: You can't, it's an onion.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Physics. Why did Tommy fall of his bike? He was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator.

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What did Thomas Jefferson's children call him? Grandpa

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i remember when i was a child i wanted a skateboard but my parents would never buy me one so late one night i crept downstairs and got a hammer and some wood and i beat them to death my foster parents baught me 5 skateboards

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The Below statement is an antijoke. The Above statement is a joke.

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What's cooler than being cool? An object at absolute zero

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What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.

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How do you kill a blind man, run over him in slow motion

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What's the difference between a tree and a lamp? One is a tree, one is a lamp.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Last but not least, Bananas are yellow.

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What does an Israeli gun sound like? Jew, jew, jew, jew, jew

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Why did the orphans kill timmy? timmy said a your mom joke.

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Knock knock Fuck off!

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whats better then a pile of dead babies? 2 piles of dead babies

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- Why did the man with the big pocket get arrested in Utah? - Because adultery is illegal in Utah.

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Q:what do you get when you get when you cross a dog and a human A: a human-dog hybrid with AIDS

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Why did the turtle cross the road? Because there was a chicken stapled to his face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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