How does Moses like his tea? Hebrews it.

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how do you open a can of coke with no tab? throw a washing machine at it

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You are the most beautiful person in the world.

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What's red and has four letters? A stop sign

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A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

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why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

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John has 5 brownies, 3 chocolate bars, and 62 cookies. What does John have now? Diabetes, John has Diabetes

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What do you get a Jewish boy for Christmas? Nothing he died in 1943!

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what is green and red and goes 100 miles per hour? frog in a blender

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how did the kenyan get away from the cop He didnt he got arrested

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My friend, who has struggled with a lifelong battle against anorexia, died yesterday..." "Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" "Yeah, me too. The car ran the stoplight and it was all over...

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A man was found dead, in an ice cream van, the other day. He was covered from head to toe in hundreds and thousands, with two flakes sticking out of his ears. The police say it was a tragedy and will be informing his next of kin in the next few days.

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"Merry Christmas, Mom! My gift to you is...ME!" "I brought you into this life you disrespectful brat!" He then proceeds to a cliff.

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Hey I just meet you. And this is crazy, but im a Zombie. And you looks tasty!

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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Roses are red, Here's something new. Violets are violet, Not f***ing blue.

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Guy 1: So how did you get into hospital Guy 2: I was drinking near my computer Guy 1: So why did it explode? Guy 2: (Doesn't reply)

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What is the difference between Barack Obama and Mitt Romney? One is President, the other is not.

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A: What do you call a female bombing the white house? Q: A terrorist

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What did the homeless black guy write on his sign? need money for weed.

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Do you want to hear a joke, Women's rights

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What is orange and sticky? A blue ice cream with no skeletal structure Hang on, Ice Creams don't talk and the ice cream wasn't even yellow!

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God, you know after creating humanity and kinda regretting it and stuff, fell into drinking and betting. He found Sin a fellow poker player, and all was good. Until God, drinking a bit too much bet a bit too many of his creds: Son. Jesus: Yes father. God: Uh, I kinda ended up low on cash on the poker game last night and I kinda well... I am gonna be frank here, I bet you and lost. NeroMetal Not dissing the bible, just enjoying the always brighter side of life eh? ;)

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Your mother is so slutty that she seduced me while I was drunk. I'm so sorry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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