How did the cat get outside? It fell out the window

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12/23/2012

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For Chuck Norris every street is one way his way.

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What do you call a muslim with a gun I dont know his name

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Is it considered sexual harassment if a midget says to a woman, "your hair smells nice"? Holy crap i don't like black people.

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why did the circus boy not do his homework? because he was in a coma.

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A dead guy walks into a grave.

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whats worse than one bee sting? two bee stings whats worse than two bee stings? the halocaust whats worse than the halocaust? three bee stings

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Two men are stranded in a structure on an alien planet, they are frightened when they are told that there is evidence of a life form near them, they explore their surroundings and find a snake-like creature that flares what looks like wings, bites one of the men on the hand and wraps its tail around his arm squeezing it until the arm breaks (we see the bone poke through his sleeve and he screams); the creature slithers up his sleeve, into his mask and lunges into his mouth killing him, and the other man is sprayed on the mask with acid and we see the plastic of the mask melt onto his face.

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A man walks into a bar. He I then taken to the hospital for a major head injury.

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everyone dislike the first joke on page one

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Whats red and has wheels? An apple, I was just kidding about the wheels.

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What's worse then a worm in your apple? When your apples a human

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Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

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oh no a butt!!!!!!!!!! your stubid oh wait your right ahhhhhhhhhh

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Why didn't the lawyer submit the car accident he endured to his local courthouse? He was dying of internal brain damage from the shards of glass lodged in his brain from flying through the windshield.

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A man walks into a bar, and then a second man walks into a bar. The third man ducked.

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How does Fred drink his milk? -computer

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A man goes to the potty.

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Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.

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went to mass. remembered to say with your spirit.

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What does A.D.D stand for? Attention deficit disorder

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What happens when an alien touches fire? It gets burnt

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So, two men walk into a bar. But the midget walks under it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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