What's the difference between an alien and Obama? - Nothing they are both aliens.

Excuse me sir, do you know where I can find the restroom? I don't know, I'm sorry.

i should have been sad when my flashlight died.... but i was delighted.

A young boy walked in on his mom and dad in their room lastnight They were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

Whats grosser then gross? A dead puppy in a barrel. Whats grosser the a dead puppy in a barrel? A dead puppy in two barrels. Created by : go josh or ty :D

So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Because her mother inadvertently left the gate open while gardening.

How old is victor? Half past dead

An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

What is the first letter of the alphabet? A. a B. 7 C. Mustard gas D. Because a penguin has 2 legs

Why did Sarah fall of the swing... She had no arms. Knock knock, who's there... Not Sarah. Face Face, who's there... Probably Sarah.

Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

A black person and a white person decide to have a race. Who won? The white person Don't be a racist.

What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

If John has 10 packs of beer and he drinks 8 packs,what is John left with? Morbid Obesity.

Why is did the blonde cross the road? She was trying to catch the chicken.

Look down at your keyboard. Notice that U and I are together? <3 Also notice that J and K are together too!:P

I'm not hungry, so when my mon offered me a pear I said to her "No thanks, I'm not hungry". 

Adam is gay tom is here that's nice

A blond, brunette, and a red head are stranded on an island. They find a genie, who tells them each one can have one wish. They all wish for the same thing, to be back home with their families.

Once upon a time there was a young teenager who was bullied a lot. She died 100 years ago.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

speacking of cheese... steve jobs died

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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