If you had 4 oranges in one hand and 7 oranges in the other, what would you have? Really big hands.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What is the difference between a Mexican and a bike? they both get hit by cars in shady neighborhoods, like Copiague, New York

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: What did the floor say to the Christmas tree? A: Your balls are hanging.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call a black guy who wins a race? A winner

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

-What's sad about four black guys driving off a cliff? -They were my friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

My grandma told me to always keep my head up and just keep going. She fell down a manhole last week and died.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why did the chicken cross the road? becuase he wanted to walk and the road was the only available place to do so

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why did the mexican work for a lawn care service I don't know why don't you ask him

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Knock, Knock, Who's there? The IRS.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was the cancer ward sad? They just lost a patient who couldn't ward off cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Waseem is such a hard worker on Anti Joke all day.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Where did Adolf go as a vacation after the war? Hell

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A musician without any music walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Who do you think you are, a hobbit?" The musician without any music says,"yeah" and turns into a hobbit

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q:what do you get when you get when you cross a dog and a human A: a human-dog hybrid with AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the bank clerk say to the robber when he demanded all the money in the drawer? "Okay."

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did Rebecka black say on Thursday? Today is thursday.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's black, white and red all over? A dead panda

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why was the kid crying his dad is a alchoholic

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why doesn't McDonald's sell hot dogs? They don't want to advertise for McWeenies.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call a black man helping an old woman cross the road? A concerned citizen.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's it called when an abusive alcoholic father iguana has trouble connecting with his wayward teenage drug addict son iguana, while at the same time the mother iguana doesn't come home till late hours and constantly calls her daughter iguana a slut? Reptile Dysfunction.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you all a black person on the moon? An Astronaut

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops