What did the doctor say to the person who is suffering from obesity? Run fatass Run

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What begins with "F" and ends in "uck"? There are multiple words or word combinations that begin with "F" and end in "uck," such as fat duck, so you dont need me to tell you, be creative.

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Do you like fishsticks? Ya, me too.

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Why did the frog die? Because I stapled it onto a boy's face.

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How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Why did Billy die? His mother killed him.

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Whats the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?? The WheelChair

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Why was the girl-scout crying? I hit her in the knee with a baseball bat.

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What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

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what is black and white and read all over? a bankrupt newspaper that cannot afford color ink because the accountant misplaced company funds.

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How many Babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you throw them

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If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

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Q: What is the proper name for a female dog? A: Well there could be several names it could be a name on the collar in which case please look for the number so it can be returned to its owner. Another possibility is that it is a stray which you should either run for it could have a disease and you should just forget about the name then or take it in as your own and name it.

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Why did little Jimmy fall off his bike? Because I threw a fridge at him.

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What is the worse joke to tell a Orpahn Knock Knock Whos there not your parents

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Timmy needed to use the restroom in class, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I go use the restroom?". The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said, "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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Whats worse than being out in the cold? Having cancer.

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Two jews walk into a bar. They drank beer and shot some pool and had a good time.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -It's just Linda from nextdoor. -Oh hi Linda come on in.

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Fill in the blank: A ______ is a man's best friend. Jake: Is it dog? Host: YES! Now for the 1 million dollars! Finish the sentence: I just saved a lot of money by Jake: Switching to Geico? Host: Sorry, that's incorrect. The correct answer is "I just saved a lot of money by not spending it on useless junk and by budgeting my account towards investing in the future." Oh well, nice try.

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What has four legs and a tail? A table with a tail

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Knock knock Whose there? Nobody Nobody who? ......................................

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How did the failing slut get an A -she studied really hard

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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