"i once had a rabbit named socks.he was a funny little fellow until one day he got over excited and...well..." "did he...i mean..you know..did he...?" "what?lose a claw,throw up, sit in a pan of warm water until he calmed down?" "yeah! :)" "yes...but then he died."

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was Tuesday, Popeyes has a special sale buy one get one free fried chicken. The chicken was like "Oh hell no, today's Tuesday? I'm funna get my feathery-asss out of here.." However, chickens do not know what day it is, nor do they care about being captured by humans. I also made up the part when the chicken began talking.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I had some crack, my unicorn says hi.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Four blonds are driving to Disney World when they come across a sign that says Disney World left, so they proceed to make a left at the next stop and have a wonderful time in what many people consider the most wonderful place in the world.

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Whats the difference between a jew and firewood? Firewood is meant to be burned in a stove or firepit while jews are functioning members of society.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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What do you call a fat man that breaks into your house at 2 a.m. and steals your money and your television? Probably a dumbass, a jackass, a moron, an idiot, or something in that general area.

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im gonna poop my pants. mom said to wipe afterwards i am a teletubby

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Jehovah's Witness. Have you heard the word of God?

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How do you scare Sarah Palin? You chase her around with a chainsaw while wearing a Jason mask.

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Life is like a box of chocolates, some are brown, and some are white.

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whats does a dog cat spider and rat have in common?the dog cat and rat are all mammals.Exept for the rat idiot!!you should have figured THAT out before!!!

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Why was the teacher sad? Because her boyfriend broke up with her.

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What happens when you shoot someone? They die.

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whats worse than finding a holocaust in you apple...........

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage?

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knock knock who's there? your mom your mom who? I'm sorry to tell your mom is dead :.(

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How does a black guy die? Unknown

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What did the fat man order at McDonalds? Nothing, he was on a diet

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Why did the plane crash? Because a loaf of bread was the pilot.

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A drunk guy walks into a bar. He orders a beer and the bartender says "Hey pal, you look and act really drunk, I don't think I can serve you any more alcohol." The man looks up to the bartender and says "You're right, I'm really drunk."

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a guy walks into a bar.. ouch

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops