why did the cow cross the road because pigs were not flying i had to write it hurts

How do you kill a squirrel? Take the jaws of life. Rip it in half. And suck on the organs.

what's black, white and doesn't float? the titanic

A cow and a goat are at the top of a hill. The cow starts to eat the grass, and the goat says, "Hey! That's mine!"

What's the difference between a baby and a tea bag? Tea bags don't scream when I dip them in boiling water

What's funnier than British people ? Their tea in the Harbor

My friends all use twitter but i dont know how to use it, so i said i will carry a megaphone around saying what i am doing at random times. Like yesterday i was in the library so i said into my megaphone "i am in the library" Yay i got 3 new followers, 2 of them were cops. Jokes From Blox Computers Corporation [Thailand] Bellow Joke In Thai: ?????? Twitter ???????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? ? ???????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? "i am ??????????" ??????????????? 3, 2 ????????????????????

Knock Knock. There was no answer.

Ask me about my wiener. How's your wiener? I don't have a wiener, I'm a woman.

Your momma's so stupid she stuck a power cable up her ass. Shortly after she died

I scream, you scream, we all scream when hit by an ice cream truck

Why are they the "living" daylights?

when life gives you lemons... squeeze the juice into your eyes.

Knock Knock Whos there? Rivkee Rivkee who? RIVKEEEEE FIRETRUCK!

A light bulb is very similar in shape to a pear. So, when you change a light bulb, don't replace it by a pear.

how do you make a plumber cry?.... kill his family

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

He--Hey guys

What's worse than farting in front of your boyfriend? Farting on your boyfriends pillow and giving him pink eye.

What's the easiest way to get a cat out of a tree? Call the fire department and allow them to safely reach the cat and properly extract it from the tree while you watch from below.

What did the statue say to the other statue? stat-you?

Knock Knock Whos there 9/11 nine eleven who? You said you would never forget...

Why couldn't Jesus get a driver's license? Because automobiles did not exist 2000 years ago.

What's white and has a crusty nose? Luke Lange

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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