I put my baby in a microwave.

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Two muffins were in an oven. The first muffin says: 'It sure is hot in here!' The second muffin says: 'Why are they only cooking two muffins?'

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Why did the chicken crose the rode? Because there was a 10 foot scorpion chaseing it

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Roses are red. Violets are blue.

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Jimmy: Daddy how are babies made? Dad: If i knew how you wouldn't be here...

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Why were 50 police officers in the supermarket? A tsunami had struck and they were cleaning out hundreds of bodies

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Why are black people like trees? Because they fall down if you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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For 10 cents a day you can feed an African...they eat pennies.

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what do you get when you cross a jellyfish, a jar, and a brown crayon? i dont know, im not into genetics, and jars dont have genes.

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What's oily and smells like smegma? Kevin Crummy

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Why did Sally fall off the swings? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not sally

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What's the difference between a Gay Man and a Straight Woman? Anatomy.

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Sigh, everybody in the world hates me :( Moral: Seven billion people? Realy?

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What does it mean when people say your mom? it means that there name is Hunter

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A man walks into a bar He wakes up from his coma 21 years later and learns that humans now serve pumpkins as gods.

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What do you call the man with no arms or legs, swimming in the bay? Bob.

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why Is the teen's sock crusty? he stepped in the glue that his little sister was using for her art project.

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Once there was an egg by the name of Steve. His name was Steve the Egg.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems make sense. 5

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Lindsay Lohan

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Why did Jimmy burn the American flag? He was Canadian.

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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What is red and cry's? A baby chewing on a razor blade

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What's 1+1? 69.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops