hey I just met you, and this is crazy. I have alzheimers. Hey i just met you.

An Asian walks into a bar. He has a few drinks, but makes sure not to have to many. He then drives home safely, and enjoys a good nights rest.

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist! Jk a terrorist

Is Barack Obama a dentist, a teacher, or the president of the United States? A dentist. He just happens to have the same name as the president.

A blind man who spoke English and a deaf man who used sign language went to a bar together. Although they didn't communicate they had a wonderful time.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Fruit loops.

You know what sucks? A vacuum.

All of these jokes are about white people

A homeless guy was walking along the beach when all of a sudden he see's what looked like to be magic genie's lamp so he pick the lamp up whipes it off then sells it for black tar herion.

http://cache.deadspin.com/assets/resources/2008/04/Deer_mating2.jpg

If a tree falls on a deaf person, does anyone care?

Why didn't little Timmy see the bus right before it hit him? Because he was blind

Hey, in case you are around and still wonder how he got out. Anonymous tip from yours truly, if he had remained there, you would all have taken the blame. Just stay away from the deep web, and I wont be forced to come get all of you as well. For a long while I was suspicious that you might have been leaking information regarding me and all of us, but then the rules changed and information regarding Point Zero, subtle hints and such, began spreading, it has been removed, nobody will know what Intel was sold, so yeah, he was a mole, he is no more, for this I am sorry.

Justin Bieber tries to get into a club but is not allowed because he is to young.

How do you make a tree angry Overall trees have no sense of emotion therefore it is impossible to anger a tree.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had legs.

Knock Knock who's there its black george washington.

A horse walks into a bar and the bar asks "Why the long face?". The horse replies " I am deeply troubled by the anthropomorphic aspects of my existence and the extent to which I am now protected by law."

Why did the plane crash? Because a tomato was the pilot.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who is there? Not Suzie

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He did not have sufficient stability in his arm at that moment causing him to loosen his grip and drop his ice cream.

what did the guy say when he lost his sandwich? wheres my sandwich?

dyslexic's Untie

Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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