What did the hobo get for Christmas? Hypothermia

Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

Knock knock Whose there? Nobody Nobody who? ......................................

Why did the girl fall off of the swings? Because I threw a refrigerator at her.

So a man walks into a bar, right?

Why did the man cross the road? Because the light was red!

What happened when the young child fell off of the swing? He broke open his head causing him to be sent to the hospital for 3 weeks.

Why did the boy fall off the bike? Because he was a paraplegic.

I know how to make a brilliant telescope out of an empty jar, some leather, a string and a brilliant telescope.

chuck norris and superman had a bet. Chuck norris immediatley won because superman is a fictional character played by an actor. Chuck norris then decided to have a bet with the actor that played superman and lost

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

"Knock-knock." "Come in, sorry that the doorbell is broken."

Q. What's yellow and looks like a duck? A. a baby duck

whats yellow and very big? I dont know. no one will tell me

he took my chicken i shoot him in the foot and raped his dog

Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

How do you cut the sea in half? You can't. There are an odd amount of letters. You would have to jeopardize the "e", but then it would no longer be "sea".

What does a gay horse eat? Low-energy foods should only be fed to horses who are not regularly being worked and participating in high performance. According to the University of Kentucky's College of Agriculture, energy is vital to horses who need to perform their best as it aids many of the body's functions including muscle contraction, respiration and circulation. Only feed a low-energy diet to an idle horse and feed a high-energy diet to an older or sickly horse and to a working horse.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

What's sadder than a lost puppy? A dead puppy.

How do you call a guy that ran over 10 children A bad driver

bangers and mash?

What does "Fiat" stand for? "Fabbrica Italiana Automobili Torino."

Whats Brown and Sticky A) a stick

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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