Why doesn't Austin have sex? Because when his wife gets hot he puts dirt on her and hits her with a shovel

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Does your iPod have zoom on it? Yeah, but it doesn't have a camera

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Why did the deer stop running? It was hit by a car

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A couple elopes in Vegas. The next morning while eating breakfast the woman tells her husband she thinks it was a mistake, using her alcoholism as an excuse for her inability to make practical decisions. The man proceeded to cry and called his attorney to arrangea proper divorce.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupter. Interrupter who? Interrupter Jones.

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What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my basement.

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Why did the man scream? He got shot in the eye with a nail gun.

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You know what's a real drag? A club foot

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Q-Why did the little boy feel hot? A-Because he faceplanted into a bonfire.

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If a train leaves Chicago at 50 miles per hour, how hard does the baby strapped to the tracks get splattered?

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I don't have a girlfriend but I do know a girl who would get really mad if she heard me say that.

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Dey see me boilin' Dey choppin' God I'm so fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juiiiiiiccccy! MR MCCANN

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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A man walks into a bar with an MP5 and proceeds to fire thirteen bullets into a crowd of people, several unarmed bystanders attempt to disarm the gunman but they are promptly ordered to stay back or they too would be fired on, a witness reports gunfire coming from down the street to local emergency services and they arrive quickly, organising a perimeter around the bar, county sherriffs decide it would be safest to wait for a swat team, as reports indicated the gunman may have hostages, however the gunfire appears to have ceased an noone has entered or exited the building since police arrived on scene. As SWAT arrives on scene and media helicopters circle above, a person emerges from the bar and the gunman appears behind him, he shoots and kills the hostage and then turns the gun on himself, the death toll reached sixteen including the gunman and as many as fourteen people were injured. there was no clear motive to the massacre, but a search of his appartment indicated he was tired of one-liners on typical joke sites and felt his wife's betrayal with his best friend was too much to bare and he simply snapped after losing his job in the current economic situation.

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This one time at Concentration camp.... My friends all died cause they were chosem in the Selection

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Whats really ugly and horny Jake's mom

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Any similarity between Jesse and a human is purely coincidental!

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How was the copper wire invented? 2 Jews pulling on the same penny!

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra drinks a bear and leafs .....

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what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

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Well, I feel that I've stepped outside my comfort zone.

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What did the little Jew boy get for Christmas? nothing he is a Jew, he doesn't celebrate Christmas.

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If you can fit many clowns in a car and many mexicans in a car...how many mexican clowns will fit?

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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