Did you go swimming in the Carribean Ocean? Yes, a shark ate my body, and killed me! Thank God I'm still alive!

whats cold, blue and hard? a frozen blueberry.

Why did the hamster cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

What do you call a fish with no eye? Blind.

why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

What's orange and is a loyalist in the orange order? Caoimhin McCann?

what do you call 10 black people in a red car? overcrowded

did you hear about the dyslexic journalist? he employed an assistant to double check his work. They worked really well together.

What did Jamie get for Christmas? Nothing. Jamie is not friends with Christmas.

My father stole my mothers heart, he's in jail for murder

Whats red and goes round and round? A baby in the garbage disposal

What kind of pizza did the world trade center order? Two cheese pizzas.

Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a canoe at him.

Wanna hear the orphan joke knock knock who's there? not you parents

Why did the man smell bad? He had not showered for several days

what happend when the magic man touched fire? He got burnt screamed in my ear and died.

What's the number 1 tip to burning stomach fat? Lighting yourself on fire.

What did Helen Keller name her dog? A. Spot

how did the snake fly? it couldnt snakescant fly

Adam eats ginger nuts the fookin chicken

Get up Look in the mirror

Two peanuts were walking down the street I stepped on them both

How many people does it take to make a fun party? Idk, that's why I asked you, you see I'm throwing a party and wantedto know how many people I should invite.

What color is a red house Red What color is a blue house Blue What color is a white house White What color is a green house Clear

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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