Why did the cook throw up at McDonalds? Because his pay check was made out to the Ronald McDonald Foundation.

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. There is a frog in his beer.

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What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone?? Cause he got hit by a bus.

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Knock Knock Hold on Im pooping.

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Three guys walk into a bar.....The fourth one ducks...

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What did the mute person tell the deaf person? Nothing. Even if sound could emit from his vocals the impaired of hearing person would still be unable to respond unless they have taken classes to read lips. The deaf person didn't take classes nor did the mute person learn sign language.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Across the street was a strip mall containing a dry cleaners where he had to pick up his suit for his cousins wedding. The wedding caused controversy in the family considering she was jewish. He had a lot to drink and took a cab home, knowing the dangers of drunk driving in todays society. He had a great time.

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What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

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What did the guy say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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A man walks into a bar and is slowly tearing his life apart. maybe because he is drinking poisonous acid instead of beer

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Well no, thats not true, sorry, I mean I GET THAT ALL THE FUCKING TIME!

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Whats the best part about having sex with 25 year olds? There 20 of them.

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So, there's a man and a bar. He gets a hacksaw.

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What's the hardest part of the pizza to eat? The motorbike.

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What did the boy reading a book do? He finished the book and took it back to library.

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What do mario and luigi have in common They are both plumbers

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A Higgs Boson walks into a church, and the priest says, "We don't allow Higgs Boson's in here," and the Higgs Boson says, "But I thought Christianity promised acceptance to everyone who believes."

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if you have 5 oranges and 15 ice cubes, how many pancakes can you fit on the roof? red, because aliens dont wear shirts.

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Q: why didn't the asian boy ask for a calculator? A: you don't need calculators to make shoes

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What's worse that tripping over on your way home from work? Finding your entire family murdered

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What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

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What did the black man say when a blond walked into the bar? " Hi Molly"

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Why did the kid cross the road? To show his friends that he had guts. And man, did he have guts.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops