interviewer: young man, do you think you can handle a variety of work? Young man: I ought to be able to. I’ve had 12 different jobs in 4 months.

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why was there no toothpaste left in the toothpaste tub? someone squeezed it all in a drawer

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What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

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Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

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What starts with a J, and burned in the oven? My Jumbalaya, i left it in for too long...

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A man walks into a bar, he then gets a giant bump on his head as he passes out and is rushed to the hospital.

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Why is travis so funny? Trick question, He died of cancer 3 years ago.

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What did boy with now arms and no legs get for christmas A pogo-stick

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I was having sex with thisgirl and now I'm going to be a dad. All because I didn't wear a condom

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Why couldn't the mother make her son's funeral? She died in a car crash on the way there.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He was at Victoria's Secret and he wasn't watching where he was going.

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A man walks into his room with a DVD and a box of kleenex. The DVD is a wedding video of his now dead wife.

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why couldn't the boy talk? Because he was dead

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Why did the black man go to jail? He stole some rice.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because

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There is a mom a dad and a son, they walk into the museum and the dad is in the bathroom.

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Guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink called "Vampire poison". The bartender gives him the drink. The man drinks it and dies. No he was not a vampire, he was just a man with a history of heart failures.

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Q; why did the German ask the Jew to go in his shower? A; because the Jew had stayed the night at the Germans house.

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roses are red violets are blue sunflowers are yellow I bet you were expecting something romantic but this is just gardening facts

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What do you call a two headed platypus? Go ask him, I'm sure he has a name.

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Roses are grey Violettes are grey I am colour blind And I suck at rhymes

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"Why is Barney purple and green?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way"

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A leper sees that a woman has dropped a bag of groceries on the sidewalk. "Hey ma'am, can I give you a HAND?" asks the leper. "No thank you, sir. I can manage." replies the woman. "That's a relief," laughs the leper, shyly. "I am quite weak due to leprocy."

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Knock knock? Who's there? Why don't you answer the damn door and find out for yourself?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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