Two muffins in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says nothing, because muffins cannot talk.

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How do you kill a dumb blonde? Personally, I love stabbing them.

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white or wheat? wheat please.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Knock, Knock Knock, Knock who? Knock, Knock

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im passing this on from a friend: 2 blondes walk into a building, you think one woulda saw it,

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Why was the minority sad? Because the police beat him and then he was raped in jail.

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Why do we have brown eggs? Because black people have sex with chickens

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Tyler Bishop is a waffle

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What would you do if Spider Man gave you super powers like his? Nothing. Spider Man is not real therefore you are most likely dreaming and need to wake up soon.

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Why was little Alice and her family at the graveyard? Well someone had to come at her funeral...

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why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

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Why did the girl go to Jupiter? To get more stupider

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To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

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3 guys walks into a park. Which one was holding the beer? None, all 3 guys were elementary kids

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and says nothing to the man running the stand. Realizing that the duck might potentially keep patrons from approaching the stand, he packs up and moves elsewhere.

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What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? Pants.

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How did the fat guy survive the air crash? He was he was astronomically and improbably lucky.

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Watching your mum get sandwiched by two black guys...

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A kid goes into the ocean on a boogyboard and then gets eaten by a shark because the shark thought he was a seal.

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Q. What do you do when you cross an elephant, and a soccer ball. A. That would never happen.

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what did the judge say to the lawyer during a trial. He said We are all in a court. thus concluding that the judge was retarted.

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Roses are Red, They are also white, Infact nowadays with cross-pollination a hugely diverse number of different coloured roses are attainable.

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What did the kid with cancer get for his birthday? Nothing he didnt make it that far

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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