Why was little Jimmy sad? Because his mum died.

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How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

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Q: How does 5 gay people walk together? A: In One Direction.

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What did one dog say the the other dog? "We are both dogs"

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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Roses are red violets are blue monkeys like you belong in the zoo but don't be afraid I'll be there to that in the cage but laughing at you

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Knock Knock Knock" "Knock knock Knock who?" "Just let me in, you twat, it's freezing out here!"

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Yo mommas so stupid, she has a slightly below average IQ.

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Two Jews are sitting in a large oven. They realize it is a dangerous place to be and get out of the oven.

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hat did the fridge say to the oven your hot baby \

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Why shouldn't you try to pick up a live scorpion with your teeth? Because it could easily sting your face, or mouth.

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How do you kill Lady Gaga? There is no point in trying, she is too heavily guarded.

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whats the difference between kroush and a bucket of shit? the bucket

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there were three men in a car, Poop, Shut Up, and Manners. They were driving in a truck when poop fell out of the car. Manners went to get him. Shut Up parked somewhere that he wasn't supposed to so the police man came to him. He asked him what his name was and he said "Shut Up" because that was his name. The police man said "Where are your manners?" then Shut Up said,"He went to go scoop up poop".

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A plane crashes in a polish cemetery the authorities have found 2000 bodies

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How many candles did Johnny blow out on his birthday cake? The same number of candles which corresponds to his age.

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Roses are black. Violets are black. Black people are black, And you're a douche.

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Why did whitney Houston become a drug addict? Because she made some very bad decisions in her life.

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Mr Mac reminds me that no matter how hard you try you will always lose your hair

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How do you get your dog to stop peeing on the floor? SHOOT IT!!!

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Why did the black man go to Jail? He was visiting his friend!

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Why did the ceiling fall down? Because there weren't any walls.

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Your mother is so large she finds it difficult to fit into regular sized clothing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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