If i wanted your 2 cents i'd rob you

There are two cows in a field. One cow says to the other - 'Are you afraid of the mad cow disease?' The other cow says - 'No, cuz I'm a duck.'

What do you call a deer that has no eyes? I have no eyedeer

What's the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench is an object and the black man is a human being.

What do Lebron James and Bill Murray have in common? They are both black basketball players. Except for bill murray

How did Alice get revenge on Diane when Diane called her fat? When Alice was pregnant, she stabbed herself in the stomach and blamed it on Diane. Diane was then sent to prison for murder and received a sentence of 25 years. Alice laughed in court, and Diane was forced to commit suicide. Alice then stole Diane's husband, and she lived happily ever after.

Who row's? •Liam Findlay

How do you get a cow off a swing? Hit it with an axe.

Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank

what's black, white and doesn't float? the titanic

What's funnier than British people ? Their tea in the Harbor

Why did the girl throw away her hairspray? Because she realized the harmful contaminants emitted from the nozzle were expediting the deterioration of the ozone layer thus contributing to global warming.

How am I supposed to eat soup without an envelope?

Q: What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? A: The wheel chair.

A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

Q: why do orphans always go hard? A: because the can never go home.

Jamie: Peter your hands smell like cows! Jason: eeh no they smell like cows balls

An Englishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman are all in the Great Britain Olympic squad,

Roses are red, violets are red, sunflowers are red, HOLY CRAP, MY GARDENS ON FIRE!

What's black and white and red all over? A dead Zebra

If u give brandon a stick he will most likely poke u

And so the baseball says to the tractor........ Your not my dad

A handicapped man walks into a bar...

What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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