What's black and white and red all over? A dead Zebra

Q: What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? A: The wheel chair.

How do you get a cow off a swing? Hit it with an axe.

Roses are red, violets are red, sunflowers are red, HOLY CRAP, MY GARDENS ON FIRE!

What's funnier than British people ? Their tea in the Harbor

How am I supposed to eat soup without an envelope?

Why did the girl throw away her hairspray? Because she realized the harmful contaminants emitted from the nozzle were expediting the deterioration of the ozone layer thus contributing to global warming.

Jamie: Peter your hands smell like cows! Jason: eeh no they smell like cows balls

Who row's? •Liam Findlay

An Englishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman are all in the Great Britain Olympic squad,

Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank

If u give brandon a stick he will most likely poke u

A handicapped man walks into a bar...

What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

And so the baseball says to the tractor........ Your not my dad

What did I say to the joke? What? Correct.

how do you keep an idiot in suspense. I dont' know he still hasn't told me

How do you make a baby stop crying? You throw it out the window.

I told a priest that I would never believe in anything greater than myself. He said I had the God complex, that I was grandios. I stared him in the eye and asked, "how highly do you think of me? Thank you" and left.

Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? I can't remember. I have amnesia from when I was hit by a bus as a child.

Guess what sucks! A Vaccume. Guess what blows! A Sucky Vaccume.

Yeah, but why is this honesty so important for you, personal reasons because you are like that, because you consider me a friend? Or because a single lie, could have catastrophical consequences?

how do u get the baby to stop choking? take ur dick out of its mouth!!!

What is pink and stuffy? Pink stuff

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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