your mom is so stupid that she is suffering from down's syndrome, and has a shorter life expectancy than normal people.

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A American seeking into mexico

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What is the difference between a bear and berries? No idea? You better stay out of the forest...

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A mexican fast food worker accidentally drops a cheeseburger on the ground. Realizing the floor is most likely unsanitary, he throws it out and gets the customer a new one.

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How many Chinese people does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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Have you heard of the lawnmower joke? (NO) Neither have I!

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag? One is plastic and dangerous to children. The other holds groceries.

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What happened when the blackman saw the white man. they both said hello

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Why are friends like trees? If you hack at them repeatedly with an axe, they fall over.

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Who smells like urine and his da is a registered sex offender with madeline mccann in his house? Aodhan hearty, May I also include he looks like a bug. Oh and don't forget the rot on his teeth, it is fucking disgusting. It really looks like he hasn't brushed his teeth in quite a substantial period of time, in my opinion, he is the only person who is actually comparible to sean.

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okay so three men are in a plane ( this is the type of plane you can open the windows) so the stewardess goes up to the first man he asks for a gun she agrees but hes gotta throw it out the window he confused but he does it anyways the stewardess goes to the second man he asks for a beer she agrees but he has to throw it out the window hes confused but he does it anyways the stewardess walks up the the third man he asks for a pack of C4 she agrees but hes gotta throw it out the window without hesitation he gets it and throws it out the window. so they land and the first man sees a women crieing i was walking down the street and got hit in the head by a gun and arested for being armed the second man sees a hobo cheering loudly hes says he was sleeping in the ally and it started raining budlight the third man shes a women hysterically laughing she says i was going to work and spilled my coffe then my house blew up!

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A very nervous looking black man walks into a bar full of white people, however, the white people are accepting of all races, so they invite him to sit next to them.

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Q: how many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: two, one to hold the ladder securely and the other to screw in the lightbulb.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Goodbye to the people who hated on me

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Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

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Why did the chicken walk across the road? Because chickens cannot fly

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What did the coworker say about the new girls butt Nothing be cause he was quite the gentleman and wanted to be respectful ts the woman as she already had enough problems such as being hit by a bus and dying.

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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Yo momma is so ugly that she should probably consider suicide

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

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How do you keep someone in suspense? Refuse to let them view the resolultion of a gripping film.

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my boloney has a first name its OSCAR, my boloney has a last name its MEYER.. now bend over son while i shove my boloney in ur butt!

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Well, I guess it's back to the drawing board.

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Making fun of Charlie Sheen is like shooting up in a barrel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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