Bride: "He went to Jared's!!! Ex: "But every Kiss Begins with Kay...."

What did Steven Hawkings say as he fell down the stairs? .................

What do you do when your wife is about have a baby? Throw her off the balcony go into parking lot and reach into her mouth if you feel a leg stab her in the belly button untill her intestines are coming out and burn the body singing Elmo's world

Today i decided to burn calories, so I grabbed my lighter from the counter and put it in my pocket and proceeded to the treadmill.

"Is this the Krusty Krab ?" I'M TIRED OF YOUR SHIT TYRONE.

Roses are red Violets are victorious 2 in a chamber Mr pistorius

This is the funniest joke in the world: Just joking!

What happened to the child who's mother drank and took drugs while she was pregnant? Dead.

If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

How did the cat get outside? It fell out the window

I tried to play soccer a long time ago. I didn't score and managed to get red card... Then I realized it was not my thing

Why was 7 afraid of 8? Because 8 knifed 10.

What do you call a Jew with 20 Pounds of Pennies? A rich man

Q: Why didn't the bunny eat the carrot? A: The bunny didn't have any carrots. Poor bunny.

Wha do you call a couple with aids? 2 pepole who need immediate health treatment.

roses are red, violets are blue, open your legs and give me an hour.

A bus with 12 black guys is driven off a cliff. What is the sad part of this story? ... Our beloved president was not involved.

What walks like a duck, talks like a duck, and looks like a duck? Nothing. Ducks cannot speak, therefore this description negates all known living organisms.

oh no a butt!!!!!!!!!! your stubid oh wait your right ahhhhhhhhhh

Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad your whole family isn't dead from a fatal car accident?

Why are rich people usually fat? They're living large

Why couldn't the woman give her sister a present? Because she just got eaten by zombies.

What is invisible and smells like rabbits? Bunny farts.

Why was the tree sad? Because a bird shat on it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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