What did the cop say to the speeding black man? "Can I see your license and registration?"

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What do Justin Bieber and corn have in common? They are both fruits. Except for the corn.

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Why did Johnny close the door on Sally's face? Because Johnny is a dick.

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If Spongebob lives in Bikini Bottom, Where is Bikini Top?

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What is the difference between a ginger and a pile of bricks? nothing. nothing at all.

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I walk into Tesco and wrestle an obese women for a packet of ''Mini's Biscuits''. This quarrel was over nothing but a trolley filled with them. I gradually became infuriated. Meanwhile, an employee commited suicide.

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How many victims of the holocaust does it take to screw in a light bulb? Zero. They're all dead you sick fuck.

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Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are dead

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What's funnier than British people ? Their tea in the Harbor

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Did you see Helen Keller's doll house? No... Well it's really nice!

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whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a mexican has elbows.

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What time is it when you run out of ice cream? Time to get more ice cream.

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After going at it for several minutes, the teenager, with a big grin in his face, finally busted a nut during Thanksgiving dinner and was able to remove the walnut from its shell and enjoy it.

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Do you know whats funny to say to someone unless they're black. Your ma's in jail.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

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what's worse then the holocaust finding a worm in your apple.

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Why did John not like his chocolate? It wasn't chocolate it was poop.

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Yo momma's so skinny she doesn't have any fat!

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what's hotter than my cousin's girlfriend? I don't know. she's remarkably hot. like, one of the hottest people I personally know.

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What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

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What did the one stethoscope say to the other stethoscope? Nothing. Stethoscopes can't talk.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a cement wall? ....Nothing fish don't run What did the fish say when he swam into a cement wall? ...Damn

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What do you say to a disabled man in a lift? Have a nice day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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