...................__ ............./´¯/'...'/´¯¯`·¸ ........../'/.../..../......./¨¯\ ........('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...') .........\.................'...../ ..........''...\.......... _.·´ ............\..............( BroFist

haiku for you ladies and gents My mother once said, "Slow and steady wins the race" She died in a fire.

Hey whats sad about 4 black people going over a cliff in a cadillac. Nothing

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? This site.

Man: Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains........ Doctor: You clearly have Alarming mental issues perhaps a psychologist would be the right person to discuss this matter further

Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

What do you call hunter ? An anerexic that is skinny as a tooth pick. Duh

why couldnt the little boy watch two and a half men? because charlie sheen left and the other guy had surgeery and now has 2 penises

what happened to the chicken who crossed the road he didn't realize that the light was green

Why was the girl's clitoris cut off? Her country practiced Sharia Law.

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

A man walks out of a bar. Gets in his car and crashes because drunk driving isn't safe.

Knock knock. Who's there? Jack. Honey, Jacks here, will you get the door?

knock knock. who's there? just open. just open who? you're really dumb aren't you

Q: Men are always very careful to have penises. Why don't women care enough to have them? A: That's a very good question.

What is the difference between a circle and a cylinder? dunno

Why did the baby crawl onto the road? because a sick bastard put a bottle of milk there knowing that a bus would be going through that route soon.

What's hotter than a woman who is face down and ass up? A woman who isn't tying her shoes.

How does a black guy die? Unknown

Last Christmas I gave you my heart But the very next day Your body rejected it and you went into cardiac arrest, we both died

Why did the boy let the falling brick hit him in the head? He had no legs, so he could not move

man:"gullible is written on the celling" boy looks up

What do you call an Asian who can't drive? Underage, and therefore has not required his license to do so.

How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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