What wuld u do for a klondike bar? Nothing taste like shit.

Why do jews have large noses? Genetics.

Who won the race? I don't know look it up.

So this guy was making a sandwich...

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

What are the first three words in a Mexican Cook Book? Steal a chicken.

What did the tree say to the plant. Nothing tree's cant talk.

a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

What did one door say to the other door? - Nothing, doors can't talk

A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

Q Why did the feminist cross the road? A To suck my dick

How do you know if a woman is cheating on you? If you catch her cheating on you

How is an elephant like a grape? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

How do you keep black people out of your backyard. A no trespassing sign.

Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their car with a coat hanger. They had left the keys inside and no-one was around to help.

Knock knock Who's there The military, your son died last night.

Why did little jimmy fall of the playground? He was blind and wasn't aware of his surroundings

What did the drug addict say to the doctor? I am a drug addict and am in need of help and rehabilitation.

why is your grandfather climbing up a pole? hes not

Why couldn't the blonde do her homework? She had no fingers.

What is long, hard, and full of semen? An erected penis.

What's black and White and black and White? A nun falling down a stairs

Q: Why was the chicken waterboarded? A: Because the guy liked being cruel to animals.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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