Q: What has no color, no shape, no size, and was born in your mind? A: The thought you just had about this anti-joke.

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So this chat, the talk on the phone was all a ruse?

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why cant black people swim? I dont know but they killed my family

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra drinks a bear and leafs .....

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why is lady gaga so famous? because she has a penis.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

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Q: Whats the best part of a bald pussy? A: After you put the diaper back on you perv!

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yo mama so dumb... because she was not properly educated

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest has his papers but the rabbi is sent to a concentration camp.

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A man walks into a bar. He hasn't been there before, and it's a Friday so it's really crowded, and it's really quite a dive, so he and his girlfriend decide to leave and find somewhere else to eat.

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What do you call a white guy sitting on a bench? The NBA.

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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Why was Jacob not allowed to play sports? He fell down in the middle off the street and got ran over 50 times and could never do anything again.

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What did the drug addict say to the doctor? I am a drug addict and am in need of help and rehabilitation.

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You tell me. I have amnesia.

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whats the difference between a baby and an onion? no one cries when u chop up a baby.

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What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

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Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

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What did the little boy want to be when he grew up? A cone

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What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a woman? Sex

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Why did the monk shave his head? So he's more aerodynamic.

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If your mom is a teacher and your dad is a gynecologist, how many pancakes does it take to stack on top of a dog house roof? 12. Because footballs don't have feathers.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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Repeat after me... I'matote ulbu twad Now say that all together Im a total butt wad

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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