What did the fat man do? He fell over...

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your mama's so ugly, she suffers from chronic deppression.

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Q: What do you call a serial killer named Mark? A: Mark.

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What did the Jew get for Christmas? Nothing. Jewish people celebrate Hanukkah

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Whats green and smells like a red apple? A green apple

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what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

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What did the man say to his wife while having sex? I don't know.

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What do you call a kid without any friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

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A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

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Santa Claus and eight reindeers walk into a bar. “Hey, fatty,” the barman shouts. “Where’s Rudolph?” “He’s dead,” Santa replied. “I’m sorry to hear that,” the barman said, looking embarrassed. “Let me get you a drink.”

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knock knock who's there? banana well that's an odd name. banana then began to break down in tears because his parents were constant drug abusers and gave him that name while they were high

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Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

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kathryn atkins

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Why didnt Timmy Go to school? He Died.

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What do you get when you mix a polar bear and a dog? A dead dog.

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this isn't meant to be a joke, but just letting all of you know, inside jokes don't count and kony jokes aren't funny

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What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

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2 guys at a funeral. "did you know the girl?" asks one of the guys. "No" replies the other. "Me neither."

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So my wife was in the kitchen, and I asked her to make me a sandwich. She agreed. I then volunteered to make her one. Lesbian relationships are amazing.

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How do you save stop your soulmate from dying of cancer? Shoot them on the head.

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You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas many gift card to stores he liked

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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