Why did the chicken cross the road? To see if he can make before the car hits him.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Elephants can jump higher than the tallest building. You know why? It's because buildings can't jump.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why was the girl-scout crying? I hit her in the knee with a baseball bat.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

How do you stuff a giraffe into a refrigerator? You can't, giraffes are too big.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A man once went duck pin bowling, 5 years later he died of leukemia.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why is travis so funny? Trick question, He died of cancer 3 years ago.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

asdasdasdasd

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What do you call most people over 50 who aren't married. Divorced

thumb_up thumb_down +33

what ddo you call someone that has a small dick benjamin

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What's the difference between a black guy and a bench? A black guy is a living, breathing human being, and a bench is an inanimate object

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Knock knock. Whos there. Your landlord. Your landlord who? Bitch, i'm here with your eviction notice you haven't paid rent in weeks

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What is grey and transparent? An elephant in a zip-lock bag.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What did the bad boy get for Christmas? Incurable cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

whats purple and not a rapist barney, I lied about the rapist part

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Q: what white hard and huge and it can kill you if you fall out of a tree? A: a refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Q: Why did the dog bark? A: it cant talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A man walks into the bar and orders a drink. This is what you do in a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What's red and bad for your teeth A brick

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the kid lay down? Because his legs were chopped off

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops