why did the jockey lose the horse race? he mistook his horse for Sara Jessica Parker

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2 mentally, unstable , woman visit the cinema , and watched "The Sweeney,"they really enjoyed it

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm color blind, How about you?

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A light bulb is very similar in shape to a pear. So, when you change a light bulb, don't replace it by a pear.

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How can you tell if a dog is under your chair? Look under your chair

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YOU KNOW YOU'RE AS FAT AS JESSE WHEN... 1. The scales don't go up to the weight you weigh. 2. You know the true meaning of the word Plus-Size. 3. You can't see your feet without sitting down.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

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What's is the worst thing america has done? Jersey Shore, We mad those idiots rich.

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Why was the fat man crying? He was sentenced to the electric chair for a murder he didn't commit.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his monthly car bill is too freaking high and can't afford to take car to work, where all of his co- workers are waiting to tease him!

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What's worse than the WNBA? The Cleveland Cavaliers.

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What's worse than farting in front of your boyfriend? Farting on your boyfriends pillow and giving him pink eye.

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Q:Why are dinosaurs extinct? A:Well there are two reasons the first being a giant meteor struck the earth killing all the dinosaurs. The other reason you touch yourself at night.

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Why did the boy break his leg? Because he fell off a building

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DAVE : did you hear the one about the poster? MICHAEL: what?

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Why was the house on fire? A dog peed on it.

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What's the most confusing day in Mexico? Father's Day.

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Male orgasm (haha bitches we've been faking it)

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Q: How many dead babies does it take to fill a mixing bowl? A: There is an infinite amount of answers to this question depending on the sizes and shapes or the dead babies, so lets assume that an average would probably be about 4 babies that dies just as the left the mother.

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So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

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Why is Keven's name spelled with an E Because his parents are black.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your best friend. No it's not, you stupid repo man...I'M NOT OPENING THE DOOR.

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Why couldn't Billy eat his dinner? Because a black man amputated his hands.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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