My dog has no nose. How does it smell? It doesn't

Holocaust. I was too lazy to make it complete, so enjoy the punchline and comment your own question. It will probably be funnier.

What do you call a dog with 5 legs? A dog with 5 legs.

hey hey apple

"knock knock" "who's there" *no answer* Opens door to find dead wife lying on doorstep with 'lol' stamped on forehead

Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

Where can you find a tetraplegic? Where you left him.

What can a Giraffe have, that no other animal on Earth can? A baby Giraffe.

You!!!!!! Cause your whole existence is just one big joke.

What's black an white and red all over? Two dead babies, one African American and one Caucasian split in half by a chainsaw.

A man accidentally chops his thumb off while preparing his dinner for the night. He immediately calls an ambulance and has his thumb preserved which is later reattached back onto his hand. He then continues his dream career as a solo pianist.

how do you make a plumber cry? pull up his pants....

Why was the girl unhappy with her male teacher? Because he gave her a bad grade...and raped her the night before.

Your mother is so fat that she has a very big butt and large breasts, which is quite attractive to some men, especially if they are open-minded.

Knock Knock Come in

A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

What's the difference between scrambled eggs and scrambled dead babies? I don't like scrambled eggs..

Q:why did the boy not have to walk his dog? A: because the dog and the rest of his family died in a terrible house fire while he was away at summer camp.

A man walked in to a store and asked for four candles. The storeman brought some fork handles and placed them on the counter. The customer said "No... 'Four Candles' a rather amusing sketch performed by The Two Ronnies, a comedy double act in the 1970s."

what happens when you punt a baby in between 2 poles? you get 3 points

How to shrink China's population in a few minutes? Nuke them all, simple.

Guess my favourite fruit. Peach.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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