Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

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How does your sister ride a bicycle? My sister does not have any legs.

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How do you confuse a blonde? take the albuterol

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Who's obsessed with death and love to make jokes about it? The majority of the contributors in this site.

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Why did george washington not make it to the prom? because george washington is dead

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A blonde was very smart, and nobody made fun of her when she sometimes made small mistakes like every other person regardless of hair color.

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Why didnt the teenager have a smartphone? He didnt live close to a cell phone store

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Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

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where do you find a dog with no legs? Korea. It's customary for the guests to get the drumsticks.

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Why did the plane leave late? Because they were out of Kellogg's® Breakfast Cereal.

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What did the T Rex say to the pterodactyl? ROIRWR!!!

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A man walks into a bar. He hits his head and dies.

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If you go to a restaurant and you have more food on your plate then someone who is obese, you KNOW you have too much food.

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A blind man walks into a bar, and a table, and a chair.

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What happens when you die? Your body gets decomposed by bacteria

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What is black white and red all over? A zebra which a lion did not finish eating.

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Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

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Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

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If life gives you lemons, You throw them as hard as you can at the nearest stranger. If life gives you melons, You're probably dyslexic.

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why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms why did suzie get hit by a bus? she was blind knock knock whos there? not suzie.

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He was a well respected member of the community.

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Why is the boy lying down on the floor? The chandelier fell on him.

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Why do black people like Black Friday? They can get fairly expensive appliances for a very reasonable price.

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A mexican, Japanese, and American man are eating lunch one day at work by the window. The Mexican says, "Wow! If I get a taco one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The Japanese man says, "Wow! If I get a bowl or ramen one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The American says" If I get grilled cheese one more time, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The next day, the mexican jumped off because he got a taco. Then, the japanese man jumped off for getting ramen. Then, the American jumped off for getting a grilled cheese sandwhich. At the funeral, the mexican wife said, "Oh if i knew he was gonna jump, I would'nt have packed it." The japanese wife said, "If I knew he was gonna jump, I wouldn't have packed it either." The American wife didn't say anything because she was hit by a bus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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