Roses are Red Violets are Blue Holy guacamole Pineapples

Once upon a time there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end.

What did the baby do when it crossed the rode? It didn't get across it got hit by a car.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple-sized tumor in your colon.

Roses are red , Violets are blue You little dumb ass bitch Ain't fuckin' with yoouuuuuu

what did the oven say to the firdge you hot baby

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

So a guy says to his dog "hey man when you piss in the toilet can you please flush, just because I don't like to look at your pee." then the dog sits back and says "...woof !!"

Why doesn't Jonathan Walk across the road? Because he is in a wheelchair...

Ask me if I'm well Are you well? No

Roses are red Violets are purple, and anyone who tells you otherwise is wrong.

What did the black man say tovtye chinese man? Hello sir how are you today?

Did you see Helen Keller's doll house? No... Well it's really nice!

Why did Sarah fall of the swing... She had no arms. Knock knock, who's there... Not Sarah. Face Face, who's there... Probably Sarah.

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen cheese

what's black and white and red all over? a zebra in a blender

Why did the short man fall down the stairs? He got shot in the face with an assault rifle.

Why did the little girl only walk half way across the street She fell into a man hole and died

you go up your hole down your hole between your hole and you rock and roll

Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense, Refrigerator Sex

No your aunties a joke

Why did timmy's face turn red? Early that morning Timmy was brutally attacked by the local street gang which proceeded to smack timmy's face with a baseball bat and smearing the blood with a dirty rag.

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What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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